How absolutely weak that you had to steal the acronym being used by parents trying to deal with the absurdity and havoc this mental illness brings to families. Typical, though. The more harm and grief you can bring the better, right?
Kids are born and brought into this world with a myriad of default settings we cannot override. Tall or short, straight or gay, cis or trans. There is no way you can make a straight kid gay, and there is no way you can make a cis kid trans. The opposite is also true.
I am sorry you have been indoctrinated into believing that having a kid that is gay or trans makes you a victim. I am sorry that your preconceived ideal of how perfect your believe your kid was is now somehow broken because of it.
My goal and aim is not to bring more harm and grief to families with trans kids, but to bring the families who disowned their trans kids back to the table, to counter the misinformation and anti-trans rhetoric that divides families and communities, and promote empathy, well-being, bridge-building to heal these divides and bring families and communities back together again.
Like having brown eyes or blue, being gay or straight, trans or cis, these are things we cannot choose and cannot change. It makes no sense to deny these aspects of our selves, and even less so to hate each other because of them.
So I challenge you to look at the rhetoric and to question the foundation of your beliefs, the rhetoric you are exposed to, and what that results for the parents you are trying to defend by attacking me.
I have immersed myself in Genspect, pittparents.com, mumsnet, and various other forums and read the stories, asked the questions, and really drilled down into the specifics of many as best as I could. In almost every case, it has been the parents own inability to open their minds and soften their hearts, to put the fact that their kids are independent individual people with thoughts, feelings, and rights and freedoms unto their own selves before their own fear, prejudice, and bigotry. In almost every case that a child has cut off their parent, it is after they are disowned, or after they have been invalidated and disrespected and their boundaries ignored. All the trans kid(s) want(ed) was simply to be loved and accepted for who and what they are - whoever and whatever that may ultimately end up being, because ultimately, no matter what name, pronoun, or configuration of the wrapper they are in, they are still the same person inside. They are still your kid, and if this is what bring them a sense of congruence within themselves, a sense of peace, well-being, and enables them to be the best version of them they can be, why should we deny them their own personhood?
Yet you lay at my feet the charge that I am happy to bring about "the more harm and grief I [you] can bring, the better..."? I say my work is holding up a mirror for parents like you, and what you charge me with is the projection of truth you have realized about yourself as a parent, but are not ready to accept - so you bring it to me and lay claim that I am to blame for your personal failings.
I research and represent what the facts say based on the science and data we have, as best as we have it, as best as I can.
No one makes a kid trans. Kids are born trans. This is not in dispute, it is a fact.
How you choose to accept or reject your child because of this - that is on you.
Feel free to project it onto me, and when you are done, perhaps you will recognize that your kid is still your kid - the same beautiful child you loved and raised - sure, things may be different now. Some things will never return, some things will never be the same, but that is balanced out with all the things you never found out and never were given the chance to explore and learn - all that stands open and available to you now! The only thing stopping you is your own fear and pride. If you don't take this opportunity for what it is, someone else will. They will end up the chosen family, when that could have been you and your kid, together, as a family.
Is a page in the bible worth this price? Is the fear and rhetoric of family, neighbors, or other people going to keep you from showing up and being the parent your kid deserves right now?
I write all this, I ask these questions, I invest this time an effort in an attempt to reach you. Because it is parents like you I want to help the most, but rarely get to talk to directly. And regardless if you engage or don't, regardless if this is productive or not, does not make a success or failure. I only hope that a seed is planted, and that you will see for yourself in time the veracity of my words today.
Because your kid? The kids of all those parents trapped in the echo chambers of ROGD and Genspect? That fund the hate group and hate machine that is fueling the very things you are most afraid will happen to you kid in the world, particularly now? That is funded from your wallet, and the wallets of all those parents.
No, This is for your kid, and all those other kids who come here looking for facts and arguments, some satire to blow off steam and laugh/cry in relief that someone else gets it, and there is an entire community here that gets it, and that if their own family, their own flesh and blood will turn them away, reject them, deny them their personhood and humanity - we will. Because unlike their family, who have proven otherwise, we can and do love each other unconditionally. Because we all have had or know someone who has had parents like you.
Ultimately, RKG, love wins and the truth will out.
![People with Inconvenient Truths about Transphobes [PITT]](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_80,h_80,c_fill,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep,g_auto/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F704ba0db-3e10-4112-9364-c2f224d0cfae_500x500.png)
![People with Inconvenient Truths about Transphobes [PITT]](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_36,h_36,c_fill,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep,g_auto/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F704ba0db-3e10-4112-9364-c2f224d0cfae_500x500.png)
How absolutely weak that you had to steal the acronym being used by parents trying to deal with the absurdity and havoc this mental illness brings to families. Typical, though. The more harm and grief you can bring the better, right?
Thou dost protest too much.
Kids are born and brought into this world with a myriad of default settings we cannot override. Tall or short, straight or gay, cis or trans. There is no way you can make a straight kid gay, and there is no way you can make a cis kid trans. The opposite is also true.
I am sorry you have been indoctrinated into believing that having a kid that is gay or trans makes you a victim. I am sorry that your preconceived ideal of how perfect your believe your kid was is now somehow broken because of it.
My goal and aim is not to bring more harm and grief to families with trans kids, but to bring the families who disowned their trans kids back to the table, to counter the misinformation and anti-trans rhetoric that divides families and communities, and promote empathy, well-being, bridge-building to heal these divides and bring families and communities back together again.
Like having brown eyes or blue, being gay or straight, trans or cis, these are things we cannot choose and cannot change. It makes no sense to deny these aspects of our selves, and even less so to hate each other because of them.
So I challenge you to look at the rhetoric and to question the foundation of your beliefs, the rhetoric you are exposed to, and what that results for the parents you are trying to defend by attacking me.
I have immersed myself in Genspect, pittparents.com, mumsnet, and various other forums and read the stories, asked the questions, and really drilled down into the specifics of many as best as I could. In almost every case, it has been the parents own inability to open their minds and soften their hearts, to put the fact that their kids are independent individual people with thoughts, feelings, and rights and freedoms unto their own selves before their own fear, prejudice, and bigotry. In almost every case that a child has cut off their parent, it is after they are disowned, or after they have been invalidated and disrespected and their boundaries ignored. All the trans kid(s) want(ed) was simply to be loved and accepted for who and what they are - whoever and whatever that may ultimately end up being, because ultimately, no matter what name, pronoun, or configuration of the wrapper they are in, they are still the same person inside. They are still your kid, and if this is what bring them a sense of congruence within themselves, a sense of peace, well-being, and enables them to be the best version of them they can be, why should we deny them their own personhood?
Yet you lay at my feet the charge that I am happy to bring about "the more harm and grief I [you] can bring, the better..."? I say my work is holding up a mirror for parents like you, and what you charge me with is the projection of truth you have realized about yourself as a parent, but are not ready to accept - so you bring it to me and lay claim that I am to blame for your personal failings.
I research and represent what the facts say based on the science and data we have, as best as we have it, as best as I can.
No one makes a kid trans. Kids are born trans. This is not in dispute, it is a fact.
How you choose to accept or reject your child because of this - that is on you.
Feel free to project it onto me, and when you are done, perhaps you will recognize that your kid is still your kid - the same beautiful child you loved and raised - sure, things may be different now. Some things will never return, some things will never be the same, but that is balanced out with all the things you never found out and never were given the chance to explore and learn - all that stands open and available to you now! The only thing stopping you is your own fear and pride. If you don't take this opportunity for what it is, someone else will. They will end up the chosen family, when that could have been you and your kid, together, as a family.
Is a page in the bible worth this price? Is the fear and rhetoric of family, neighbors, or other people going to keep you from showing up and being the parent your kid deserves right now?
I write all this, I ask these questions, I invest this time an effort in an attempt to reach you. Because it is parents like you I want to help the most, but rarely get to talk to directly. And regardless if you engage or don't, regardless if this is productive or not, does not make a success or failure. I only hope that a seed is planted, and that you will see for yourself in time the veracity of my words today.
Because your kid? The kids of all those parents trapped in the echo chambers of ROGD and Genspect? That fund the hate group and hate machine that is fueling the very things you are most afraid will happen to you kid in the world, particularly now? That is funded from your wallet, and the wallets of all those parents.
No, This is for your kid, and all those other kids who come here looking for facts and arguments, some satire to blow off steam and laugh/cry in relief that someone else gets it, and there is an entire community here that gets it, and that if their own family, their own flesh and blood will turn them away, reject them, deny them their personhood and humanity - we will. Because unlike their family, who have proven otherwise, we can and do love each other unconditionally. Because we all have had or know someone who has had parents like you.
Ultimately, RKG, love wins and the truth will out.
The truth is out. The indoctrination has been exposed for all to see. No more freaks grooming our kids.
I feel so honored by all of your kind words here. Thank you. Our communities deserve to have their stories told and their voices heard.